It is so easy to adopt a victim’s mentality because we live in a fallen world. Jesus promised in John 16 that, in this world, we would have tribulation, but after making that statement, He also gave us hope by saying, “Be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” When a Christian has a victim’s mentality, it is very difficult to bring them into a place of inner healing because, sadly, they want to cling to their bitterness. In their mind, it vindicates their innocence. In other words, their unhappiness and bitterness are proof that they were wronged and are innocent victims. Jesus said He came that we might have life and have it more abundantly, and that promise is true even for those who have suffered the most injustices at the hands of other people. As we have said many times, every Christian is in union with Christ, and Christ is their life (He lives in them actually to live His life through them). Jesus doesn’t live with a victim’s mentality; He lives as an overcomer.
In my own life, my father was an alcoholic due to the family brokenness he was raised in and the impact of serving in the Philippines during World War II. He was not a mean man; as a matter of fact, he was very kind and never intentionally hurt me, but his alcoholism restricted him from being the kind of father I’m sure he would’ve wanted to be if he were whole. For the first 23 years of my life, I felt like a victim because of my father’s brokenness and believed the lie from the enemy that I could never be all that God wanted me to be because I was the victim of a broken parent. The truth is, even though God never orchestrates broken humanity, He uses everything to bring us into a deeper abiding life in Christ.
For years I felt sorry for myself. Then 44 years and two days ago, the Lord showed me that my weaknesses and every area of brokenness in my life, which was the result of the brokenness of others, were platforms from which He could demonstrate His perfect adequacy and strength. The next morning, I woke up filled with the Holy Spirit, and my life was transformed. At that point, I laid down the right to think like a victim. Instead, I felt privileged and blessed because I knew and every one of those broken places Jesus had deposited immeasurable wealth. I saw that the weaknesses in me resulting from an imperfect world and imperfect people did not disqualify me from the abundant life Jesus came to give me. Those very weaknesses positioned me to experience the wholeness of Jesus being lived out through me. The result was I was immediately freed to repent of my unholy attitudes towards my life and towards anyone who had contributed to my weaknesses. I had been miserable for years, not because of the circumstances of my life but because I had believed the lie that I was the victim of an unfair and fallen world, instead of believing the truth that God who is good had been depositing “the treasures of darkness” in my life all those years. My self-pity and resentment became thankfulness and Christ-likeness.
If you find yourself in a place of perpetual misery, it is imperative that you realize that it is not someone else’s fault, though they may have been deeply at fault. God does not cause all things to happen, but He does cause all things that happen to work together for our good. Our refusal to search out and discover the good that God has deposited in us in those dark places is the source of all misery in the Christian life. Jesus wants us to believe that He is the good news – the gospel – about every broken place in our lives. He has purchased those broken places, and from them, He wants to display His wholeness. “The lame take the plunder” (Isaiah 33:23c). We are gospel people. We are people of good news, not bad news. We are Easter people, and our song is Alleluia!